Question 512: ‘Good women are for good men and vice versa’. What about Asia and Pharaoh or other examples we daily see in our lives. How does one interpret this verse?
Answer 512: As an improvement for their opinions that is behind why ‘Good women are for good men’ some adduce an argument of the Holy Quran in which Allah (SWT) says: “Vicious women are for vicious men, and vicious men for vicious women. Good women are for good men, and good men for good women. These are absolved of what they say [about them]. For them is forgiveness and a noble provision”.[1]
Arabic version:
الْخَبيثاتُ لِلْخَبيثينَ وَ الْخَبيثُونَ لِلْخَبيثاتِ وَ الطَّيِّباتُ لِلطَّيِّبينَ وَ الطَّيِّبُونَ لِلطَّيِّباتِ أُولئِكَ مُبَرَّؤُنَ مِمَّا يَقُولُونَ لَهُمْ مَغْفِرَةٌ وَ رِزْقٌ كَريم
But, considering that every general rule has exceptional cases we see many different examples some of which have mentioned in the Holy Quran that are against the rule as follows:
In one hand, Allah draws an example for the faithless: the wife of Noah and the wife of Lot. They were under two of our righteous servants, yet they betrayed them. So they did not avail them in any way against Allah, and it was said [to them],” Enter the Fire, along with those who enter [it].
Arabic version:
ضَرَبَ اللَّهُ مَثَلًا لِّلَّذِينَ كَفَرُواْ امْرَأَتَ نُوحٍ وَ امْرَأَتَ لُوطٍ كَانَتَا تحَْتَ عَبْدَيْنِ مِنْ عِبَادِنَا صَلِحَينِْ فَخَانَتَاهُمَا فَلَمْ يُغْنِيَا عَنهُْمَا مِنَ اللَّهِ شَيًْا وَ قِيلَ ادْخُلَا النَّارَ مَعَ الدَّاخِلِين
As we see, the wife of Noah and the wife of Lot’ relationship with the prophets was of no avail to them and therefore they were told to enter Hell along with other unbelievers.[2] Because, the noblest of you in the sight of Allah is the most God wary among you.[3]
On the other hand, Allah draws an [other] example for those who have faith: the wife of Pharaoh, when she said,” My Lord! Build me a home near You in paradise, and deliver me from Pharaoh and his conduct, and deliver me from the wrongdoing lot.” [4]
Arabic version:
وَ ضَرَبَ اللَّهُ مَثَلًا لِّلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ امْرَأَتَ فِرْعَوْنَ إِذْ قَالَتْ رَبِّ ابْنِ لىِ عِندَكَ بَيْتًا فىِ الْجَنَّةِ وَ نجَِّنىِ مِن فِرْعَوْنَ وَ عَمَلِهِ وَ نجَِّنىِ مِنَ الْقَوْمِ الظَّالِمِين
Also, Allah (SWT) draws another example: “And Mary, daughter of Imran, who guarded the chastity of her womb, so We breathed into it of Our spirit. She confirmed the words of her Lord and His Books, and she was one of the obedient”
Arabic version:
وَ مَرْيمََ ابْنَتَ عِمْرَانَ الَّتىِ أَحْصَنَتْ فَرْجَهَا فَنَفَخْنَا فِيهِ مِن رُّوحِنَا وَ صَدَّقَتْ بِكلَِمَاتِ رَبهَِّا وَ كُتُبِهِ وَ كاَنَتْ مِنَ الْقَانِتِين
In addition to the above mentioned issues, we need to take the followings into our consideration.
- This verse of the Holy Quran (i.e. surah al-Tahrim, verse 10) is the continuation of the story of Ifk “slander” was revealed and which was a proof of chastity. Allah, the Almighty speaks about the fate of the two ladies immediately after He reveals verses denouncing Aisha and Hafsa for their act of hurting the Holy Prophet (PBUH). He (SWT) introduces these two women as ungrateful women who despite being married to noble and righteous people, acted treacherously towards them. They were the wives of the Prophets (as), but their relationship with them was of no avail to them and therefore they were told to enter Hell along with other unbelievers.
- The main aim of the word ‘Khabithat’ (Unclean things) mentioned in this verse is unchaste. Meaning that none of the Prophets (as) and the Imams’ (pbuth) wives deviated from the right path and committed such sins. When the holy Quran talks about the wives of the Prophet Noah and Lot that they betrayed the prophets, it means that they spied for the disbelievers. It doesn’t mean that they committed adultery. Because, the houses of the Prophets must be keep away from such sins that people hate. Otherwise, they couldn’t communicate what has been sent down to them from Allah, the Almighty.
- Some of the Prophets and Imams’ (pbuth) wives were not infidel or disbeliever at the time getting married to them. They sometimes went astray after nubuwwat (prophet hood), so after that the prophets didn’t continue their relations with them.
When Asiah got married to Pharaoh the Prophet Musa (as) wasn’t born. When Musa (as) raised up among people she acknowledged His faith, but she had no choice except to live with Pharaoh and then she finally had been killed by Pharaoh.[5]
Ju’dah bint Ash’ath, the wife of Imam Hasan (as) is another example we need to know about. This marriage took place in Kufa and she poisoned Him on instigation of Mu’aviya.
Imam Ali (as) asked Saeed bin Qays, the Ash’ath’s brother to marry his daughter to Imam Hasan (as). When As’ath realized he goes to his brother and dissuaded him from marrying his daughter to the Imam and married Saeed’s daughter to his son (i.e. Ash’ath’s son). He then goes to Imam Ali (as) and said: The girl you proposed for Imam Hasan is my son’s wife. After that he married his own daughter to Imam Hasan (as) with much importunity.[6] According to some sources, Imam Hasan (as) hasn’t had any children from Judah.
According to Shia sources, Judah instigated by Mu’aviyah (according to Ibn Abi al-Hadid, she instigated by Yazid bin Mu’aviyah[7]) as he promised her that if you poison your husband (Imam Hasan) you will get married to my son Yazid and be received a lot of money.[8]
According to Tabarsi, when Imam Hasan (as) has become martyr Mu’aviyah gave Ju’dah money but didn’t fulfil the other promise.[9]
What the reason behind why Judah and his father committed such capital sin was that they instigated by Mu’aviah, the caliphate of that time. It wasn’t because she loved yazid.
This may raise a question as to whether or not the Prophets and Imams (pbuth) didn’t use the knowledge of the unseen in such situation to get married to a pious woman but not like the one who poisoned the Imam.
In the Holy Quran Allah, the Almighty says: “In the Apostle of Allah there is certainly for you a good exemplar, for those who look forward to Allah and the Last Day, and remember Allah greatly”.[10](10) So, the answer is obvious as they are our examples we ordinary people follow their sayings, behaviors, and demeanors.
If they use the knowledge of the unseen in this matter how is this thing possible for us that don’t have the knowledge of the unseen to choose a woman we made sure she will never go astray in the future!
According to the above mentioned issues and the following types of families mentioned in the holy Quran we can conclude that however it is a rule that good women are for good men, but there are some exceptional cases are against the rule. Also, this verse of the Holy Quran is about unchaste that comes after verses denouncing Aisha and Hafsa for their act of hurting the Holy Prophet (PBUH).
Therefore, it is not an obligatory rule that we Muslims must act upon it. It is just examples for us to know that the noblest of us in the sight of Allah is the most God wary among us and being wife or husband of the pious persons like the prophets was of no avail to us.
Types of Families in the Holy Quran: there are four types of families mentioned in the holy Quran as follows:
- Husband and wife of the same mind in doing the righteous deeds like Imam Ali and Fatimah Zahra (pbuth). “They give food, for the love of Him, to the needy, the orphan and the prisoner”[11]
- Husband and wife that are in harmony with each other in malignancy. “Perish the hands of Abu Lahab, and perish he”[12]
- A family that man is good but the woman is bad. “the wife of Noah and the wife of Lot. They were under two of our righteous servants, yet they betrayed them. So they did not avail them in any way against Allah, and it was said [to them],” Enter the Fire, along with those who enter [it].””[13]
- A family that man is bad but the woman is good. “Allah draws an [other] example for those who have faith: the wife of Pharaoh, when she said,” My Lord! Build me a home near You in paradise, and deliver me from Pharaoh and his conduct, and deliver me from the wrongdoing lot.””[14]
For further information in this regards, please refer to the following answer:
Index: Essential Requirements of a Successful Marriage in Islam, answer 515.
Index: The holy Prophet’s (pbuh) knowledge of the unseen (Gheyb), answer 393.
Index: Death of Asiya Bint Muzahim / Pharaoh ordered her be nailed to the floor, answer 528.
[1] . Surah Noor, verse 26.
[2] . Tafsir al-Mizan, Vol. 19, Pg. 575.
[3] . Surah Hujurat, verse 13.
[4] . Surah Tahrim, verses 10-11.
[5] . Tafsir Nemooneh, Vol. 14, Pgs. 425-426.
[6] . Abi al-Faraj Abdul Rahman bin Jozi, Pg. 27.
[7] . Ibn Abi al-Hadid, Vol. 16, Pg. 11.
[8] Mufid, Vol. 2, Pg. 16; Ibn Shahrashoob, Vol. 3, Pg. 202; Arbeli, Vol. 2, Pgs. 138-139.
[9] . Tabrasi, Vol. 2, Pg. 13.
[10] . Surah al-Ahzab, verse 21.
[11] . Surah al-Insan, verse 8.
[12]. Surah al-Masad, verse 1.
[13] . Surah al-Tahrim, verse 10.
[14] . Surah Al-Tahrim, verse 11.